St. John Chrysostom said that in marriage, husband and wife become companions on a journey. He says there are two kinds of marriages: those that bring great blessings to the husband and wife, their family, and their neighbors; but there are other marriages which seem to bring few blessings to anyone. The difference between the two, he says, is in the spirit of the bond in which the marriage is formed….
Read More“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser.” Everything Jesus says about love is grounded in this organic connection: Jesus the Vine, the Father the Vinedresser. We are branches joined to the vine. That means we have no life in ourselves. Our life is utterly dependent upon His. That’s the background for our Lord’s teaching about love, which comes eight verses later.
There, in Jn 15.9, Jesus says, “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love.” Notice that the Lord does not say, “Abide in love.” It’s easy to be in love – for a time. It’s easy to feel love when we’ve set a romantic mood and there are no crosses to bear.
But Jesus is not preparing His disciples for a make-believe life. He is preparing them and us for the way of the cross….
Read MoreJoseph is in agony. He’s spent the very first season of Advent contemplating divorce. Joseph is betrothed to Mary. Some Bible translations render it “engaged,” but it’s much more than that. Betrothal is a legally binding marriage that is not yet consummated. Today, you can break an engagement without any consequence except the down payment on the reception venue. But Joseph and Mary are not engaged, they are betrothed, and the only way out of that is divorce….
Read MoreThere is a spiritual realm. There are demonic powers. And if our eyes were opened, we would see it at work in our world, with terrifying intensity.
Demons harm people. In today’s Gospel, Jesus warns about the danger of people being freed from the demonic returning to its servitude, because—the image goes—the house was not furnished. There was no change….
Read MoreA wise man once said, “Some people work very hard at top speed, only to find themselves falling further behind.” Does that describe your life? It’s tempting to imagine that this is the result of our always-connected devices, with the expectation that you work from the moment you awake until the moment before your head hits the pillow. Certainly the ability to be on another continent in a matter of hours, and the twenty-four hour news cycle, leads to a frenzied sort of existence. But at its core, the saying reflects a very old problem. This saying—“Some people work very hard at top speed, only to find themselves falling further behind”—this saying comes from The Wisdom of Sirach [11.11 NJB], a second-century BC Jewish book similar to Proverbs. The more things change, the more they stay the same. I read from the NJB; the ESV is a bit more stately: “There is a man who works and toils and presses on, but falls behind so much the more.”
That idea of failing, falling, falling behind – it’s a universal human experience. Try as we might to accumulate resources, it’s never enough. And time, our most precious commodity, is steadily ticking away. All the fears about population and climate change reflect the human anxiety that we are running short, lacking, dying.
That’s what underlies today’s Gospel. It’s a real event, not a parable. Jesus really did change water into wine at Cana. It’s not fiction – but it is loaded with symbolism. Running out of wine makes the wedding a failure….
Read MorePro-abortion activists in the United States want more than abortion as a legal choice. They actively fight against those seeking to help women give birth to their babies. Disrupting a recent fundraising event for a Washington, D.C. pregnancy center, one protestor shouted, “Abortion forever!” …
Read MoreIf you’re with Christ, then Satan is your enemy. That’s what today’s Gospel is about. The devil is the strong man, but Jesus is the stronger, who invades the devil’s palace. The incarnation is the invasion: Christ enters the world to do combat. The first Sunday has Jesus in the wilderness, as a man, not exercising the powers of the divinity. The devil assaults Him, and Jesus fights back … with what? The Word. That is your weapon against the devil’s assaults. Memorize the Bible. Meditate on it, recite it in times of temptation and trouble.
Today Jesus tells a little parable about a man who is set free from the devil, but then his life is just empty; he doesn’t grow into being a Christian. The devil assaults the man, and takes him back. It’s terrifying….
Read MoreThe March for Life, however others view it, is a march behind the cross. The liturgical statement of the crucifix leading us both towards the altar and later out of the church is the statement that this alone is the good that overcomes the world’s evil….
July 27, 2019
1 John 4:7-12
Immanuel Evangelical-Lutheran Church, Alexandria, Virginia
During the LCMS convention this past week I had lots of time to think about parliamentary procedure: motions, amendments, amendments to the amendments, and calling the question. Calling the question ends debate. During the convention a wise person said to me, “Calling the question doesn’t work in a happy marriage.”
“Yes,” I agreed, “but limiting speeches to two minutes would probably help!” We want discussion to end, and move to voting. The democratic ideal, that each person gets an equal vote, cannot work in a marriage, because it’s a society of two. And we cannot call the question, or end discussion, because the community of marriage is founded on discussion.
Mark, you and I share a love of German things. Perhaps you’ve heard of the German man who said to his wife, “I love you, and if anything changes, I’ll let you know.”
I know it’s blasphemy, but even the love of Teutonic culture can go too far! Discussion within marriage is like the liturgy – a joyous repetition of eternal truths. When the Lord gives us His benediction, we don’t just say “Amen,” but rather, “Amen, Amen, Amen.” So let your love be expressed like the triple Amen. “I love you, and it’s not going to change, but I will keep letting you know.”
Marital discussion is not political discussion, intended to persuade or impose your will on the other. It is a discussion with an entirely different purpose: “How can I help you?” “What do you need?” St. John Chrysostom calls this obedience – a voluntary and continuous placing of self in service to spouse. He says that in marriage it’s not a matter of one partner obeying the other, but of both partners obeying each other.
But you can’t be married for too long before you want to start calling the question, raise a point of order, or maybe even walk out of the assembly. The Bible readings you chose show us a better way: “In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 Jn 4:10).
Conflict is resolved not through winning the argument but through the taking away of sins. “If God so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 Jn 4:11). Marital love cannot then be defined simply by the romantic or the erotic, but by the reconciling power of absolution and self-sacrifice.
Mark, shortly after you were baptized, you wrote me a note that included this line: “I have received the greatest gift.” I wonder if you still thought that when Kirstin was coming down the aisle. She’s an incredible gift to you.
But it is still true. Baptism is the greatest gift, because it gives us the foundation for everything else. Baptism gives us the righteousness of Jesus, His life, His resurrection.
The gift you have received becomes the gift you also give. The Holy Spirit, through St. Paul, tells us that Baptism is also how the husband relates to his wife.
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. (Eph 5:25-27)
This means, Mark, that Kirstin is holy, not just today, but throughout your life. She is without blemish, without spot, without sin. That’s how the Lord regards His baptized, and that’s how the husband regards his wife.
Baptism is the foundation of the Church; and according to St. Paul, baptism is also the foundation of holy marriage. Marriage is a little church, and Mr and Mrs Reistad, you are to be commended for the way you raised your children. I was overwhelmed with joy when I heard Kirstin describe the spiritual life of your home. Most significant was the bedtime singing. It reminded me of this hymn:
Lo, the’apostles’ holy train
Join Thy sacred name to hallow;
Prophets swell the glad refrain,
And the white-robed martyrs follow,
And from morn to set of sun
Through the Church the song goes on.
This is what happens at a Christian marriage. The Song goes on. A new family, a new little church, takes up the Song. The Song is a hymn of praise to the Lamb.
Mr and Mrs Reistad, Kirstin told me that she didn’t like it when in the evening you would sing the Nunc Dimittis. I couldn’t understand why. But she explained, it meant the singing was over. But it’s never over, Kirstin. It just pauses for a moment so we can sleep. Now you and Mark take up the Song. Let it animate your home, your marriage, your souls. As God blesses you with children, you teach it to them.
That’s really what marriage is. Not the exultation in romantic love, although I hope you have it in abundance. Marriage is not a contractual arrangement, as though we are exchanging goods and services. Christian marriage is singing the Song, the Song of Christ, as we help each other get to heaven.
So we never call the question in holy marriage. Never end the discussion. When trouble comes to your marriage, from within or without, sing the Song. Remember the gift, the greatest gift. Now, through your marriage, the song goes on. ✠INJ✠
The day will come when things will have gone sour. You will have gotten on each other’s nerves. You will have misunderstood each other. You will have disappointed each other – maybe in a severe way. You may even question if you still have a future. But the godly marriage, no matter how rough the waters are, comes back to this question: An nyong hah se yo - “Are you at peace?” And the answer, between children of God—especially husband and wife—the answer is always, 네 - Ne: “Yes. I am at peace with you - because God is at peace with me. If Jesus forgave my sins, how can I not forgive you yours?”
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